^this is what I was doing a year ago. Why can't the weather be like this right now?
I realize it's semi-chilly outside right now, but that doesn't change the fact that tomorrow's high is going to be in the 80s. Ugh.

^the auckland tower, '04
update: not going to New Zealand.
I'll go when Jenny marries Marc with a C.
Hopefully I'll get more than 4 months notice that time. haha.

Looks I need $1600 sooner than I expected.

I'm goin to New Zealand!

thank you, ikea

fotoblog

hillsborough baptist lions vs. the it doesnt matter cause we beat 'em team

#79

^told him to look like a mean football player, and this is all he could come up with!?

^the mikey cheering squad. as you can see, they're pretty B.A.

insomnia?

you know, there's only so many things to do when you're alone. and unemployed.

how unfortunate. but, im not complaining, even if it sounds like it ;)

I've gotten pretty good at making lemonade out of lemons- practice makes perfect. Who knew.

And, things are looking up in the job world- people keep planning weddings, and I'm reaping the benefits! I've got two lined up already, plus the honor of being a guest at another two.. mmm wedding cake. (note to self: something must be in the water.)

i forsee neglect.

tumblr was made for me.

that is all.

"life's a climb..

but the view sure is great."

baha.

p.s.

if i cut hair for a living, i'd have these.

p.s.s

can you believe it's almost september?!

what I'm feeling wednesday

discomfort.

phew!

practicing being domesticated is hard work!

so far I've gone grocery shopping for 5 people, cleaned out the fridge and organized the pantry, done the dishes, and still on the horizon for tonight is laundry and cooking dinner.

How did I get myself into this you ask?

I have no idea.

at least I aint got no kid on my hip.

June 12, 2009

I have some horrible news!

my pro account expires tomorrow on flickr!

):

..okay so it's not horrible news or anything. just an inconvenience.

I managed to squeeze in a large upload today though, just in time:

happy birthday dad!

p.s.

I can't seem to figure out why blogger likes to cut off my pictures.

sorry! :/

inspired.

So, I just left my dad's birthday party to type this down-
I have come up with a new photo project I want to undertake this summer.. and I am pumped! yes, I just said pumped.

The Plan:
to photo-document my family, including all my extended family members.
I want to make a photo book with portraits of each person: I'll dedicate a page or two to each family, with a unique individual portrait that fits their personality, and then a group portrait with each person from that family.

I'm hoping this will push me back into photo-love. My camera has been neglected since shawn and aubree's wedding, and I need to start taking photos again! I pour through hundreds each day, and I can't seem to figure out why I haven't been capturing images of my own.

For a shorter, easier to complete project, I want to make another photo book documenting this summer. How cool would that be?
Kind of like a year book of my life.. but in a summer.




anywho, I'm really excited!
I'll edit this post later and add a photo or two.. but I had to get this down now!

p.s.

super long photo-post coming up next from my dad's birthday :)

get dat tat

oh, it's happening.

le balloon rouge

lets be honest,

how cool would it be that kid?

i think i love this.

thumbs up

happy hump day!

(story of my life.)

sorry.. i'm still working on photo credits :/

P.S.

coolest mug EVER!

hey adele, you are fabulous

rites of passage

may- a month full of too many events.

seriously, there is like a birthday for every day this month! 

and both my grandparents from my dad's side died in the month of may.

lets not forget graduations..

and weddings!

I love may though, despite it being busy. I just love birthdays, and celebrating them. Not just mine, but you know. Birthdays have always felt so special to me.. and I like making it special for others. I try to put out some effort. I haven't been too awesome on the birthday train lately though.. I've gotten a little lazy. But after tomorrow, I'm going to try and make birthdays special for everyone again! I got a 'happy gram' in the mail from one of my teachers in high school today- she's been a teacher for like.. 20 years- and has some big birthday book that she records EVERYONE'S birthdays in. Every year in high school she'd send you a 'happy gram' that wished you a happy birthday and wrote down your name on the birthday section of her chalkboard. Sounds elementary, but I liked it. And, I just found out that she sends 'em even after you graduate! What a woman. I want to be like that. ..Hmm.. I think I'll start my own birthday book! (;

This birthday will be hard though. My grams is gone, and I won't be getting one of her special hand-made (well, printed out) birthday cards- she'd spend HOURS on each one on her computer! She was cute. I'll miss those.. But I'll miss her more ): 

In fact, every birthday we have a carvel cake, and her and my aunt would always split a slice so she'd get the vanilla, and my aunt would get the chocolate. Little details like that keep popping up in my memory that I'll miss. It's hard to explain. Sigh. 

I still can't believe she's gone. 

It's been an experience, that's for sure. It's funny how loss can bring everyone together again. I haven't spent this much time with my aunts and my cousins in quite a while. It's really refreshing.. I didn't realize how much I missed it all. We have family gatherings allll the time, but I never felt like I was actually spending time with everyone, if that makes any sense. I miss knowing what is going on in everyone's lives (which, I mean, everyone kind of knows everyones business already, because no one can't keep anything a secret -but know what's going on everyone's lives first hand!).

Part of my birthday tomorrow is going to be spent with the fam (and I mean everybody). We're all going to meet at my grandma's house and have lunch, and we'll prolly look at all the old photos they've been scavenging through for a slideshow of my grandma. I'm kind of excited about it. 

..after that, I'm hittin the spa! 

they were all booked in the morning.. so i'm stuck goin round 5. Oh well. I aint complainin! 

weird. I'm going to be 19 in just a few minutes. 

doesn't seem like a big deal.. but I remember turning 7 (to my disbelief) and thinking I was SO OLD! I'm so old! Time has gone by so fast... and if anything, it feelings like it's getting faster and faster. Sigh. Life really is short. 

thats all I got.

Love,

michelle

p.s.

I'm singing at my grandma's funeral on tuesday with val and two of my cousins.

"wind beneath my wings" isn't exactly one of my favorites.. but it's my grandpa's song, and it was special to my grandma. I'm hoping I'll be able to get through it without choking up :(

p.s.s

and, because every post looks better with a picture:

I should have a 'stache bash next year. 

I mean, right!? 

(;

or

I want a cake with my face on it.. like this one. baha

classic!

call me crazy..

I'm redesigning my room. again.

actually, I could really still call this the first redesign, since it was really never finished.

It involves dividing my room up with  1.curtain panels which will create a walk-in closet (so to speak) 

2. this nifty lil guy:

(so i wont be doing work in bed anymore. I'm constantly drifting off.. it's just too comfy.)

and 3. walls with color!

and I'm sick of the previous color scheme I had in mind originally, and white walls aint cuttin it. Bump dat! 

(don't worry jessica, the new scheme wont involve pink walls.)

anyone have any color schemes they wanna share?

I'd like to thank ikea for their inspiration and the headaches they induce. Oh, and thanks for being so close to my house now. Actually, I take that back. This could be a future problem. 

Special shout-out goes to urban for giving me an idea on shelving involving crates.  Sounds ghetto, but its cheap, efficient, and I'm old enough to buy spray paint. 

(p.s. urban, don't put old furniture in your free section if it AINT FREE. And I'm glad I didn't pay 70 bucks for your crappy coat rack! overpriced son of a..) 

:D

goodnight all!

Love,

Michelle

p.s.

via cardboardlove.com

What is it with this week?

I just want to get away. 

news news news

My classes end June 10th- which means, after June 10th, I have no classes. Obviously.

So what does that mean? What willll I be doing until July 26th?

Well, I asked the same questions. And today, I got some answers. 

1. No more kids camp planning. Kids Ministry=Caput. Val and Dan have stepped down, because they don't want to do it anymore, and apparently have been telling people for 5 months, but no one had taken initiative to take over everything. And, we only have like 3 kids every Sunday. Two of them are related to me. So, Kids church is taking a break.

2. Camp Warrior is the new main focus. So, for 3 days a week, the interns will probably be working Camp Warrior.. if not Monday and Friday too. And it looks like we'll be getting paid. 

Not my dream job, but hey! $$cash money! ..More hours than I've been getting (; And, they go on tons of field trips! Looks like I'll be livin it up at skateland this summer...

No really, they'll be going to tons more places this year. I'm kiiiiind of excited about it. I wouldn't chooose to work it myself, but, since I kind of have to, it's not that bad. 

And part of our intern duties will still be helping plan youth camp. I'm hoping that things will be less stressful than last year.. 

3. I think thats it. I still want to hop on a plane and fly somewhere for my birthday, but I may just save that for another time (; Don't really have any alternative plans yet, but I'm sure I'll think of something fun. I just don't want to end up doing the same ol same ol. 

4. I'm thinking about getting another job on top of camp warrior. I need the dough- I need to start saving. For what, I'm not sure yet. All I know is that my savings account has a suffix of 0 dollars and 0 cents.. and my checking account aint that far behind. 

the end!

-michelle

p.s 

it is pouring rain outside right now, and I'm looovin it :)

p.s.s

paper chain countdowns!!!!

If only it was July

There are not enough hours in a day! 

I'm avoiding responsibilities right now:

-midterm for brett's class tomorrow. I really should be writing rough drafts for his THREE essay questions tomorrow.

-need to finish editing 8th grade pictures.. I got an extension till tomorrow.. but I still have a bunch to go! Here's one:

 

...in my opinion, graduating middle school aint that big of a deal. Cap and Gown? Really?

-read for val and g's class

-start reading a book that has to be read by next week...so i can write an essay on it.

and okay, I take back the whole "not enough hours in a day" thing. 

It's my fault I haven't done any of it yet. Sigh. There are just so many other things that I could spend my time doing! ^All that is boring (minus the editing. that aint so bad). I only live once, right? (;

oh and side note..

how many freakin May birthdays are there!?

tooooo many. 

..back to the grind :/

another beach day!

Akiya's 5th birthday party (Ft. DeSoto Beach):

(we share the same birthday (: they just decided to have her's earlier)

this is akiya's grandpa standing next to my shrinking grandma.
the tallest and the shortest (not counting the kiddos) members of our family.

and I have never been more entertained watching little girls open presents before today:

she loves hannah montana. 

one more thing.. on the way home my grandma told me all about how when i was little every time my grandpa saw me he would grab me and pick me up and sing to me the song "Michelle."

He passed away when I was only 3.. but I do remember him doing that. Sigh. Love that song.. and my grandpa was quite the man.  Apparently he could carry a tune like nobody's business, and wanted to be a conductor when he grew up.. but instead was a cop. In brooklyn. My grandma talked my ear off about him the whole way home... she really misses him ):

..All in all, good day. Not burned, ate good food, and the grams wore me out. I want to go to New York. 

Love,

Michelle

#74

^got myself a coat wrack, finally.
It's HUGE! and its this awful canary yellow color, because urban was out of white when i took back the one with the missing pole. Most of my coats/jackets are red (I went through a red phase..it comes back every winter) ..so it looks like this ketchup and mustard mcdonald masterpiece in my room. I would've kept the the picture above in color, but the color clash is just too awful to be shared with the interwebz.
I plan on spray painting it a cooler color.. if I get around to it (;
At least all my coats arent on the floor anymore!

In other news,
I was told for class I had to make a 3 year plan for my life, and I think it's actually helping me kick the 'ole procastinatin habit.
My parents were overjoyed when they learned I wanted to use my bright futures up at the 'ole HCC. And, thanks to AP and dual enrollment classes, Gen Eds can suck it big time!

I'm still a little leary however. "Introduction to the Internet" and "Introduction to Adobe Acrobat" seem like SUPER fun classes to take.. I might not be able to handle all that excitement, if you know what I mean... But I guess I'll deal. Easy A's, right?

Now all I need is a super cool job so I can buy these.

oh hai God

Service was... epic today. I can't really describe what happened, but I haven't felt God's presence like that in a long time. And it wasn't even service really, it was after service when everyone stuck around and decided to just worship a little longer. 

Literally what had been a crappy last night and a morning that was starting out pretty crappy too (not that any one had done anything, it's just been me feeling crappy), God surprised me and did a little switcheroo when I wasn't expecting it, at all. 

Everything that was said and spoken to me was confirmation of exactly everything that has been going on right now. Everything. And it was confirmation that everything that has been going won't be in vain.. even though it feels like it. God's hand is in the mix, he knows what he's doing, and he's got a plan. 

Perfect timing, really. 

I've been so frustrated this past week. SO frustrated. 

Not with just one thing either. Everything.

I forgot. I forgot who God was. 

I forgot that He can change any situation and make it good. 

I forgot that even when I feel like I'm in the darkness, that is where He is made light.

I forgot that his burden is easy, and his yolk is light.

I forgot that he knows me by name.

I forgot that he's always been there, even when I haven't been.

And to be more specific, cause I was kind of vague up there,

I received a text from a completely random person  (zuriel jessica! raaandom) telling me something they thought I needed to hear, someone I didn't know came up to me and told me they had a word for me, and everything the come&live! guys spoke they thought God was speaking/doing/situation our church is in right now was right on key. They even spoke about someone that had left the church hurt/something had been broken, and that we needed to find them and apologize and fix things. Needless to say, I cried. A lot. I mean, right!?! ohsigh.. God, you're good. And I need to quit grumbling.. because You're good.

That is all.. kind of. 

This is just the beginning. 

and not to be completely off topic, but I think I might start watching fringe. I hear it's addicting. In fact, I might start having a fringe night every week at my house myself.. my tv might not be large enough though. THATS RIGHT. hahaaaa

Love,

Michelle

Insomnia

I can't decide what to write anymore. 

I don't feel like posting anything I just spent the past two hours typing out. 

Most of it sounds and looks like the last couple of posts, I'm a broken record!

But, how am I doing?

I am lukewarm, complacent, lazy, stressed, excited, confused, frustrated.

I'm a magic eight ball, ready to spit out any kind of answer. 

Too many things are going on, I can't focus and I keep trying to do it all on my own. Baad move.

It's after 5 in the morning, and I'm waking up at 9 tomorrow beach it, bask in the sun, read something I actually want to read, and hopefully untangle some of the mess in my mind. 

That's all you're getting for now :)

Love,

Michelle

p.s.

If I wasn't so dependent on caffeine I wouldn't have these late nights problems. I get horrible caffeine headaches now if I don't get my fix during the day! Never used to have that problem. I blame the internship and mcdonalds for getting me addicted to caramel iced coffee and chicken biscuits. I've also discovered iced coffee from starbucks.. with soy, and it's delicious. and soy. How am I going to survive the real world after this!? 

p.s.s

blog about well project to come soon!

"rosesarebeauts" bahaha

I just found my old livejournal. The one I had before the one I have now.

I'm finding that I used to be an extremely interesting poster back then.. seriously, I'm addicted to reading my old posts. It's weird, because I barely remember writing ANY of it. I used perfect grammar, witticisms, and most of the time, visuals. And my vocabulary wasn't so bad either. 

Hmm, I must have been a pretty cool 16 year old. 

I'm glad I never deleted it. It's 16 year old Michelle, frozen in time. Wait.. 15. Just saw the year. 

 

It's crazy how much we change over the years, whether it be in little minute details, or in huge areas of our lives. I'm not saying I'm done changing either.. I'm just glad that chapter of my life has a big fat CLOSED sign on it. 

haha.. now I stay up till 3 in the morning wasting my good solid sleeping hours away and wondering what I'm going to do with the rest of my life. I'm pretty apathetic toward it right now though.. I don't really feel like seeking an answer to the big "What are you going to DO?" question. I could care less, although it's not like I don't think about it. I just don't feel motivated enough to act on it. Maybe it's just because my stubborn side sticks out like a sore thumb and this is just my way of sticking it to society and it's ideas that high school graduates have to go to college or their future will be very, very dark. I'm just avoiding the idea all together. 

It doesn't help though that every time I seem to blog I'm half asleep and don't really feel like doing ANYTHING at all, let alone figure out my future. 

..I'm going to sleep now, before I ramble on too much and make myself sound dumb. If I haven't already. Ha.

way to go, hot shot

I can't please everyone, not even myself. 

I hate it.

how exhaaaausting!

p.s.

my hair is starting to look like my life

..straggly with split ends baha

drunken texts, reader beware

I think I forgot how to have fun.

Or maybe I'm just becoming an old fart.

I find myself looking forward to going home everyday.. so I can "relax and unwind" as my mom would call it.

I'd rather stay home in my robe and watch a movie by myself than go out on the town. Even the thought of going out right now tires me. 

I think my "thinking cap" is permanently attached to my head right now. Seriously, the wheels are turning 24/7.

Am I turning into some kind of introverted hermit?!

I think I need to stop waiting for time to move faster.. and that sounds like an oxymoron. 

I need to get out more. Live a little. Maybe I'll take up belly dancing classes. bahaha.

p.s. 

Does anyone find it weird to listen to mayer now that you follow him on twitter? Because I think his tweets have killed the magic for me a lil. I find him borderline annoying. Now I just pretend John Mayer and @johncmayer are two completely different people. Problem solved! 

I'm just sleepy and delirious. I shouldn't have a blog for these reasons. It's like drunken texts.

..and i just re-read all that and I sound like a drama queen. But I'll still post for your enjoyment. 

prepare to be shocked

and they still have plans for the sanctuary..